Snake Eyes.  My boy.  The goods.  The shit.  The Real Deal baby.

My first true love.

While a part of me will always, ALWAYS want to do some sort of “Ultimate” Snake Eyes (and still plans to, despite the Wave 3.5 Retaliation figs) I also really, really love the idea of making new ones for unique situations.  I had a ROC Ripcord body with an extra Snake Eyes head on it for AGES when I had my ROC guys set up, and when I started this whole Impact Armor project I realised that I was going to have to give him a proper Snake Eyes treatment instead of just a headswap, sword and uzi.

Recipe

• Head – Dollar General Snake Eyes
• Torso/Upper Arms – ROC Duke
• Lower Arms – ROC Snake Eyes (v43)
• Upper Legs – ROC Snake Eyes (v47)
• Lower Legs – ROC Charbroil
• Webgear – ROC Snake Eyes (v47)

All up, it was pretty easy painting him because the grey that I happened to have was an exact match for the one they already used on Duke’s Impact Armor.

The hardest part was getting him nearly completed and then having him stand next to the other kids at the Impact Armor playground and realise that little Snakey’s been eating way too many Wheaties.  He was towering over everyone.  Something about the SE thighs and Charbroil shins made him seriously tall, so I carved out a section of the shins (about 5mm) and shortened him a bit.  That made him a bit more normal, though still quite rangey.

Shitty part too was breaking the fucking silencer off the DG Snake Eyes.  I fixed it back on, melted it a bit, and then the fucking thing broke off AGAIN.  Wickedsad, so I just glued it (slightly crooked) and left it.

I was nearly done with the original gangsta’s from the Impact Armor crew (Rise of Cobra) when it hit me: There were more figures with this armor!

So I dug around to find parts that would match Sandstorm, surprisingly easy really, and made a new one that was going to get the complete workover.

Recipe

• Head – 25th Firefly
• Torso/Upper Arms/Upper Legs – ROC Ripcord
• Lower Legs – ROC Snake Eyes

Sandstorm was fun because I knew fuckall about him.  I sort of thought that he could be a sniper or some shit for the Impact Armor Team when they’re all assaulty and missiony.  I liked the idea that he’d have some desert camo and a bigass sniper rifle from Marauder’s.

[EDIT] I see now that he’s an MP, so I might try to work that angle instead.  But I do really like the idea of a ‘Perimeter Control Specialist’ on covert ops being a sniper.  I mean, other than ninjas, what else would you have?

Shipwreck was a character that I immediately liked in the toyline and missed terribly from the movie.  He would’ve been a brilliant addition, especially with his badass knit watchcap and Impact Armor instead of that stupid Popeye hat and chinos.

That said, I liked the Impact Armor heaps.  So much so that I did a custom of everybody that had some, and then some!  But I still had to give him some of the trademark pants and sailor-style boots.  Plus, instead of the gray battle camo on the Impact Armor, I gave him blue as homage to the sea, ARR!

Recipe

• Head/Torso/Arms/Upper Legs – Shippie
• Lower Legs – ROC Storm Shadow
• Feet – Damn… I honestly forget.  The Customs Box is getting pretty full these days.

Shipwreck was fun and I’m really happy with how he turned out.  EXCEPT… the joints.  Fukkinell, it is a bastard to try and get the joints whittled down to where they won’t rub paint off when you move his legs.  I’m still not sure that he’s okay for this, but I’m too afraid to check.  FRUSTRATING.

Cover Girl was yet another one of those figures that made me wonder, “Why in the Blue Fuck was she even IN the movie?”  Because really, let’s hire the hot chick for a menial role yet still with a recognisable code name, then kill her brutally when she hasn’t even done ONE THING that was cool or awesome.  Fkn LAME.

So yeah, I wanted to do a custom of her not only because the Joes are low on de wimmins, but also because I felt bad that her part in the movie blew anchormen.

Recipe

• Head – ROC Cover Girl with 25th Ann. Scarlett’s hair.  Carved, cut, styled and set before painted blonde.
• Torso – ROC Scarlett.
• Upper Arms – Agent Helix
• Lower Arms – ROC Baroness
• Upper Legs – ROC Scarlett
• Lower Legs – Agent Helix
• Feet – ROC Scarlett (no fkn heels in combat please!)
• Belt – 25th Firefly with ROC Paris Pursuit Storm Shadow’s holster.
• Holster, right leg – Renegades Ripcord.

The head was the fun part because it kind of cheeses me that these chicks would be portrayed with their hair down when being all coverty and missiony.  Plus, I was really happy to find a way to give her the two pistols that the original character has.  It’s sort of like a trademark, even if the movie screwed her over, she still gets to be cool.

At first, Agent Helix kind of pissed me off. I had no idea who she was, her face looked a little funny, her guns were absolute shithouse and she was hard to fkn find for under $10. Then, I won a low-bidding auction for her and somebody else I needed (one of the Neo Vipers maybe?) for pretty cheap, getting her for about $5. Then I’d remembered I’d already bid in another auction for just her, and I ended up winning another low-bidding affair and getting her for about $4.

Once I saw that I could do a custom or two with her parts, she sort of grew on me, and then I found out that she’s in the video game which me and Oldest Child recently picked up used at EB Games. So I’m no longer pissed off by her. She’s not my favourite, but she’s alright.

Recipe

• Head – DUH
• Upper Torso – ROC Baroness
• Lower Torso – ROC Scarlett
• Upper Arms – ROC Scarlett
• Lower Arms – Agent Helix
• Upper Legs – ROC Baroness
• Lower Legs – ROC Scarlett
• Feet – ROC Scarlett
• Holster – NO IDEA, it came with a lot of about 12 figures I won for $22 and I don’t know whose it is. As far as I can tell, it doesn’t match up with ANY modern-era G.I. Joe, so it must be from another toyline.

The urge to create an entire squad of Impact Armour Joes from Rise of Cobra was a big one and one that I’ve had for a while. I’m SO glad that I did it and found a place for some of the more out-of-place figures in the set like Helix and Cover Girl.